Is it really the worst thing?

TWO DAYS! I gave that anxiety two days of my life! Two anxious filled days about a situation/incident that hasn’t even occurred yet. I feel that I lost those two days trying to figure out how to deal with the problem that could come up. I feel that I lost those two days.

There was a change in assignments at my day job and it created a hysterical person in me. I was anxious. I was told it was the worst thing that could happen. I was told this was one of the reason why someone quit the job. I was told it was difficult. I was told it was repetitive and too stressful. That was what was being assigned to me!

I created world wind scenarios in my head. I was recalling some past events in my life when I was overly worked and overlooked by my co-workers. I was anxious. “I DON’T WANT HISTORY TO REPEAT ITSELF”, I thought to myself, while planning out my escape plan! Two days, I gave that two days of stress – nothing is happening yet!

Karl, my boyfriend, desperately looking for a solution for me. I was defensive, angry and alone. I didn’t what a solution, THERE IS NO SOLUTION! Oh the agony of it all – nothing is happening yet, I was anxious.

He said, “I feel like I lose you every time you’re anxious.” He wasn’t trying to fix my problem, he wanted me back and I wanted the same. I lost myself for those two days for something that’s not even happening. I stepped back a little bit to realize that I was losing myself. I wanted to enjoy my days. I wanted to not worry but worry won me over those two days.

We were listening to an audiobook, Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can’t Stand Positive Thinking by Oliver Burkeman. In the book, he mentions Eckhart Tolle, a spiritual teacher, who had a question “Do you have a problem right now?”. That question hit me, thankfully it did! I’m worrying about something in the future that may or may not even happen. I forgot to live in the moment; I made the future more important than what’s happening now.

After learning Karl’s fears and thoughts about my troubles I realized that I wasn’t focusing on the now. We were after all on a trip of a lifetime and I was there pondering on work issues that may or may not even happen. The sun was setting, the clouds were aligning, ducks were swimming on the lake and the water was red from the reflection of the sunset. I couldn’t enjoy them 100 percent. Thankfully, I was able to get back in the moment to realign myself with the world around me.

I also had to remind myself that even if all my worries do come, it wouldn’t be the worst thing that could happen to me. That even if they come, I will be able to handle them. I have a choice to accept and not accept what I would like to keep in my life, no matter what. I have a choice to dwell on things or to figure out solutions for when they come – but not now!

Do I have a problem right now, this very moment? I answered “NO” & my worries and anxiety left. I freed myself from that, giving me an opportunity to enjoy my time with Karl wholeheartedly; worry and stress free!

So if there is something bothering you, ask yourself, “Do I have a problem right now?”

IG: @piawiaventures

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Positive Vibes Wednesday – 4.17.2019

I’d like to start your Wednesday with some positivism! I intend to post more positive things each week or so! 

So, here is a lovely poem, empowering women to see themselves as the wonderful phenomenal women that we are! 

Phenomenal Woman 

by Maya Angelou 

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size   
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,   
The stride of my step,   
The curl of my lips.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,   
That’s me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,   
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.   
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.   
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,   
And the flash of my teeth,   
The swing in my waist,   
And the joy in my feet.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Men themselves have wondered   
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,   
They say they still can’t see.   
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,   
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.
Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.   
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.   
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,   
The bend of my hair,   
the palm of my hand,   
The need for my care.   
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

What a wonderful day it is to be a woman! Yesterday, on my way home from work, I was listening to Oprah’s Super Soul Podcast and I ran into this one with her reading Maya Angelou’s poem. In her podcast, she reminds us to be ourselves. She reminds us that our sole goal in life is to be the best selves we can ever be! It’s funny because the chapter in the book I was reading (Girl Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis) said the same thing! What a coincidence?! Both Oprah’s podcast and Rachel’s book remind us that our job, especially as women, is to be ourselves, to stop asking for permission to be ourselves, to be true to ourselves. The people who are truly meant to stay and matter in our lives will love us despite them not understanding, despite them not agreeing. Even if you change, the people who truly matter should be the people who will love you for exactly who you are! 

So this is my positive vibes Wednesday! I hope you get inspired and motivated today to be who you truly are. Just be yourself! Be the bravey you want to see in the world! 

Happy Happy Wednesday! ‘Til Next Time! 

Yours Truly Yours, 

Piawia! 

<3

Notes:

  • Phenomenal Woman Poem by Maya Angelou
  • Super Soul Podcast with Oprah Winfrey
  • Girl Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis